I was standing on a lonesome sea shore, away from flock, trying
to absorb beauty of sunset. I saw a long packed bottle was floating on the sea
waves. As if waves are playing with it and want to throw it towards the shore to
reveal some secret. A bottle struggling to go inside depth of sea and wants to
conceal itself like a pearl hide itself in seashell.
My tendency of curiosity is on now peak and I rushed on
rolling sea waves bare foot and jumped to catch the bottle. I got that in my
hand and held it as if I won a trophy, I moved towards seaside and set on wet sand.
It is wonderful to see a rolled paper inside a bottle, like a map of treasure or
message, used to keep inside by ancient sails. I got indulged in opening of that
bottle but it was so much tightly packed that I had to break it.
Now a paper roll came out, I looked around to make sure that
none of other is going to see this secret. No there was no one, except me. I
opened that slowly. In a very first look it seems as a message or letter, written
to someone. I know its bad manners to read other’s letter but could not resist reading,
it goes like this-
Dearest dear Peter,
As you know I am princess of my father, who brought me up
with lots of love, care and attention. I am the one who is trained to do all
things of her parental choice with their approval and for their contentment. I
am not allowed to love anyone of my choice. I am born to follow all traditions
and norms and to die within these borders.
I saw you in social
gathering you were sitting next to my father, I observed you deeply and you
were just a boy of next door then. God might have written something else for us
and he turned all circumstances upside down. You and me came face to face then,
a chance to know each other… to be friend or may be more than that.
I had gone through the moment when I filled with the fearing
of losing myself for you and to fall for a person who had nothing common with
me nor is acceptable by my family. I closed myself into a shell and come up as
a dump for you. But it was late… I had already fallen for you.
You flirted, played and then got soft corner for me. You were
confused with so many mixed sentiments. Finally you discovered it was love for
me.
At last you dared to accept it boldly by holding my hand, to
express into three magical words… I love you. First, I thought that, it might
be your prank and you will probably laugh in second moment and make fun of me. But
the next moment I was thrilled by reading hidden note into your eyes; it was
pure love for me.
I didn’t accept it because I am not that much lucky to
absorb that emotion in my life. These social norms would not let me admit nor
you could dare to go beyond these borders. I have to accept all facts and I had
to leave. I want to save you from being hurt. I have to move from your world by
accepting proposal of my family’s choice, to admit the blame of coward.
I am upset shattered and broken inside, silently screamed
and cried a lot.
I tried my best to accept another Stranger in my life with
my elder’s approval- physically, as soul was already surrendered to you.
I am feeling some where I am losing my patience and breaking
from inside, can’t cope up with these fake customs. When a soul had been
already surrendered to you then how can I adjust with other?
If this body made up of three elements of soil, water and
fire then I want to submit this holy stiff to any of these. It is a holy
surrender to join you from soul. I know you might be leading life of your choice
but give an inch to me, to roam around you. There is something which I always
left unexpressed and unsaid.
A desire to touch your soul through my words set me to fire
and burned so much that I picked my pen in this moments and it started bleed,
out of warmth of my emotions.
What you are for me? If I start thinking then this thought
takes me out of world, inside the galaxy of sublime and that fades in the glow
of brightness of my sentiments. When I try to measure depth of my love for you
the ocean surrenders and seems high, mountains comes down to bow their head,
Clouds melts into water and cry in the shape of rain.
I always tried to hide my feelings for you in my heart just
as a flower holds smell inside, a wind holds storm; earth holds trees and life,
clouds hold water. My love is like a secret of nature still to be discovered
and revealed. The more you will be
curious the more you leave unanswered.
This affection has no reasons it might be one of nature’s
mysterious mystery. I am unable to carry this warmth hold inside me and want to
free my soul for loving you. I want to unwrap this secret emotions for you to
let these float into universe. I am sharing through my pen, in the hope it
might reach you.
Now it’s time to go and to be untie all bonds and to free
myself from all worldly strings.
Love you always
Yours ever
Julia Joseph
I felt as if I had turned into living statue by the
thought that could so much ‘love’ be
felt by someone for other? Do these love stories exist in real life too? Will I
be able to experience it in any phase of life? I am feeling touched and left
with my soul shaken…
